Movie 96 It’s Pat (1994)

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Julia Sweeney as Pat

Imagine looking at this for 80 minutes.

It seems that mid-week we became rather big in Japan. Either that or they are all just lot smaller there. I thought I would prep you for the low level of comedy in Movie 96. Thanks again to those reading again and welcome to all you new readers. We should smash through the 2000 mark soon and we have a competition coming up if you follow us on twitter. We will be giving away some of these horrors on DVD. That’s your secret santa at work sorted.

Saturday Night Live is an institution in America. It has launched the careers of comedy legends like John Belushi, Phil Hartman, Chevy Chase, Dan Ackroyd, Will Ferrel, Mike Myers, Amy Pohler and my personal heroine Tina Fey. Some SNL sketches turn into multi million dollar movie franchises. Some don’t. Guess which category we are going to talk about. Unfortunately, for every Wayne’s World there is an It’s Pat. Whereas the novelty of Wayne and Garth lasted for two movies, various reprieves and a cult status lasting over 2 decades, It’s Pat’s novelty lasted about as long as Mohammed Ali in an egg and spoon race.

It’s Pat is centred round just one joke for the entirety of the film. Sadly for us that joke is of the standard of someone answering the question “Have you got Kids?” with “not that I know of!”. The whole movie centres round the ambiguity of Pat’s gender. Is he a man? Is she a woman? Both? Neither? What would I rather be doing? Why am I doing this? Is this a midlife crisis? What am I having for dinner? Should I call my Mum more? All questions that came into my head during this 77 minute epic. Side splitting jokes build up the suspense of Pat’s sex where he/she has a banana in his/her pocket or sits on ‘some nuts’. All hilarious stuff. Now, some of the feedback for the blog says we should give away more spoilers because in truth some of these movies sound too painful for you to even watch. So, here it is. SPOILER ALERT. We never find out Pat’s gender. SECOND SPOILER ALERT. No one cares. I was expecting a poor version of Tootsie or Mrs. Doubtfire but those films had plots. It’s Pat really is an aimless meander with a supporting cast obsessed with working out what Pat is. Unfortunately they didn’t show the same level of dedication to proof reading scripts. In fairness they can’t be completely to blame. It is easy to say that an unfunny script, based on the hapless exploits of a questionably gendered oaf would never be a success but Miranda won a British Comedy Award. So, was It’s Pat (1994) actually way ahead of it’s time. No, is the answer but I needed to come up with a talking point of some sort.

I’m sure Andy will reveal the other plot twists and intricacies in his portion but here is a disclaimer before you read it. He enjoyed it. I mean he really enjoyed it. It has to be said that It’s Pat was the first film to make us laugh for the right reasons. In the second half of the film it becomes clear that Pat is an arsehole but unlike Mo’nique in Phat Girlz we kind of like him/her. It forced one laugh out of me but Andy let out a few chuckles. I even suspect that he has updated his ‘likes’ on his facebook profile. And for that reason I will leave you to him to describe what could well be his 96th favourite film of all time.

Craig

@CraigHazell

Well hello again everyone.

There seems to be two types of bad films. 1) The sort that is so hilariously bad that is becomes enjoyable and 2) The sort that are so terrible that they are completely unwatchable. At the moment we seem to be alternating between the two which means that, luckily, ‘It’s Pat‘ falls into the former. It’s Pat is essentially a 35 minute joke which has been padded out to the 77 minute mark with ridiculous Jewish stereotype throat noises. It tells the tale of a person whose gender is a mystery to everybody, driving them all crazy with intrigue. Just not crazy enough to just simply ask Pat outright. By the way, here’s an example of the terrible throat noises that I mentioned and also an idea of the level of comedy we’re dealing with:

 

It appears that Craig has grassed me up here slightly here because, yes, I did slightly enjoy this film. In the second half I actually found myself laughing at the parts they wanted me to and I’m certainly not as easy to make laugh as your typical audience member of Russell Howard’s Good News who will roar with laughter at a fart joke (just ask Craig when it comes to him pitching me his stand up jokes). It’s important to mention I still think this is a horrible movie and basically just one drawn out joke; a joke that isn’t in the least bit funny. But half way through the movie Pat stumbles into a job as a radio agony uncle….auntie….uncle….oh god! It’s at that point that the movie has a few enjoyable moments when Pat basically becomes a dick (but we still don’t know if Pat has one). ‘It’s Pat’ slightly succeeds where Phat Girlz spectacularly failed in turning a minorly likable character into a bit of an arsehole and then giving him/her a redemption at the end. It’s a very basic storyline but, hoorah, it is a storyline which on this list is a rarity. Those of you who are fans of innuendo might enjoy this clip. Fans of comedy, however, probably won’t. Also, why would a lady who is clearly so uncomfortable with male or female hygiene choose to work in a shop selling pharmaceuticals?

 

So the main story focuses on Pat’s neighbour Kyle’s inexplicable obsession with Pat’s unknown gender and his attempts to go to any length to get confirmation. Of course it turns out that Kyle is in love with Pat but he’s in love with Pat in the same unexplained insulting-to-the-audience way that Bella Swan is in love with Edward Cullen*. This is the part where the movie becomes very weird and, if I’m being honest, quite perverted  One scene, where Kyle attempts to force himself on Pat in the way you’d expect from a Premier League footballer, leaves you wondering why Pat doesn’t press charges. Probably the biggest frustration for the audience is the fact we never find out Pat’s gender. I know they’ve done this in an attempt leave the audience guessing but instead this film just leaves the audience second guessing their sanity.

I need to finish on two points; a) It’s Pat grossed an embarrassing $60k at the box office and b) there are no fart jokes in Craig’s stand up set.

Until next time,

Andy

*I was MADE to watch Twilight.

@TheAndyGibbins

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